Chicago Bears at New York Jets, December 14, 1985

[bapo!]

Wait, December 14? Wasn't that a Saturday? Yes, it was!

I've talked before about how I sometimes go back and watch games from my childhood. But I don't want to see the ESPN Classic stuff; I want to watch forgettable games that have faded from everybody's memory. The more nondescript the teams, the better. I started a thread about this a few years ago when I went thru a Howard Cosell phase and re-watched a bunch of Monday Night Football games and boxing matches.

Today, I settled on this Jets/Bears game. This doesn't fit my usual criteria: The 1985 Bears were anything but nondescript, and those mid-'80s Jets teams are among my favorite teams ever, so I was going to be familiar with most of the players. But the game itself wasn't anything special.

Okay, let's go to the videotape.

The broadcast opened with a 2-minute video package narrated by Pat Summerall. Both coaches (Mike Ditka and Joe Walton) were from Western Pennsylvania, so there were plenty of shots of Pittsburgh steel mills. These mini-movies used to make every game feel like a big deal.

The visuals: Astroturf. Over-sized jerseys with ironed-on numbers. Bulky shoulder pads. Clunky on-screen graphics. Joe Klecko's cockeyed stance at nose tackle. Mark Gastineau's hair.

Dave Duerson recovered a Mickey Shuler fumble on the Jets' first possession, and he was in on a lot of plays in this game. Walter Payton had a lot of carries, but he didn't do much outside of one big pass reception. Those are the only players who have died that I know of. Jim McMahon is having problems now. Al Toon retired early because of concussions. I'm sure that a lot of players from this game are suffering in some way, some of them horribly. It's unavoidable to think about this stuff now. Fortunately, I don't recall seeing any injuries being followed by Summerall and Madden joking about the player 'getting his bell rung.'

The biggest sponsors during the first half were Hewlett Packard and Stroh's. Stroh's! Other beer/wine ads: Heineken, Budweiser, Michelob, Andre champagne, Riunite Spumante, Bartles and Jaymes. Also saw an unironic Pabst commercial and one of those great Colt 45 commercials with Billy Dee Williams.

Bud Light ran a series of their 'Give me a light' commercials. I hadn't seen this one in 30 years, but I remembered every frame. I even knew how the last dog was going to bark as it jumped thru the ring of fire. (Can anybody tell me who that actor is? He was a comedian, right?)

Other notable commercials:

A Gillette ad proved that razor commercials have always looked exactly the same. Then an Oldsmobile Toronado ad featured a car driving thru the desert. Nope, car commercials haven't changed, either.

Mary Lou Retton (!) shilling for Energizer. Chuck Yeager for AC Delco. Dan Marino for Chevy Cavalier and Isotoner gloves. John Houseman's famous Smith Barney ads. And a horribly, horribly awkward Doug Flutie ad for English Leather cologne.

After this game, CBS aired a St. John's/UCLA basketball game. During half-time, CBS interviewed Walter Berry and Reggie Miller to hype the game. Walter Berry said that he enjoyed visiting Los Angeles. That's not exactly great trash-talk.

Also, CBS didn't do much to promote their other shows. I was expecting to see a bunch of promos for whatever dramas and sit-coms they were airing in 1985, but I only recall two ad breaks that mentioned them: Airwolf, Murder She Wrote, Crazy Like a Fox, Mary Tyler Moore's forgotten '80s sit-com, etc.

A handful of Jets had a hand-warming pouch sewn onto the front of their jerseys.

Madden mentioned that this new trend of receivers wearing gloves is 'taking the place of stickum.'

Jets fans boo'd every time Refrigerator Perry did anything noticeable, which wasn't often. They found other reasons to boo as the game wore on: the Jets' defense continually jumping offsides, Ken O'Brien getting hit repeatedly, the offense trying to run the ball and going nowhere.

Madden and Summerall didn't seem to grasp the significance of this Bears defense. This was Week 15, so it should have been obvious by then how great they were, right? I can only recall Buddy Ryan being casually mentioned three times.

This wasn't the most exciting game to watch. Two very good defenses, not much offense, nothing noteworthy. (Well, one very good defense and one historically great defense.) Add in the cold weather, the wind, and the presumably properly inflated footballs, and the offenses couldn't do much. But, even tho it was kind of dull, it was still easier to watch than a game today. Fewer commercial breaks makes a huge difference. Overall, this is worth seeing just to witness the Bears' defense's dominance, but it's not a game that I would recommend highly.

[DaveInSeattle]

This wasn't the most exciting game to watch. Two very good defenses, not much offense, nothing noteworthy. (Well, one very good defense and one historically great defense.) Add in the cold weather, the wind, and the presumably properly inflated footballs, and the offenses couldn't do much. But, even tho it was kind of dull, it was still easier to watch than a game today. Fewer commercial breaks makes a huge difference. Overall, this is worth seeing just to witness the Bears' defense's dominance, but it's not a game that I would recommend highly.

Oh god, here come's Johnny to post 29 "Fuck you Haterz!" memes in righteous indignation...

[MaxWebster]

a) this post/thread is epic. I for one would like more of these Mr. Bapo! if that is your name.

b) Jeff...___? the comedian in the Bud Light commercial...? i think?

[Rex]

that intro!

[Ryan]

Madden's part in the intro is the fucking best

[Rex]

Madden and Summerall didn't seem to grasp the significance of this Bears defense. This was Week 15, so it should have been obvious by then how great they were, right? I can only recall Buddy Ryan being casually mentioned three times.

I think it's fair to say that there was a lot less of people trying to put things in historical perspective in real time during games back then. Even with that, I'm not sure the '85 Bears defense would have felt quite as historic then as it does now. At that time, most great teams were known for their defense--the Steel Curtain, Doomsday, Purple People Eaters, etc. I guess SF was in the process of changing things by 1985 but there wouldn't have been anything remarkable about the best team having the best defense then.

[Rex]

But this was definitely vintage Summerall-Madden. Three hours of fussing and joking about the weirdest things, it was so great.

[Rex]

"Bill Walton and the Celtics against Patrick Ewing and the Knicks"???

[bapo!]

that intro!

'Forged in the heat of The Beaver Valley.' I love that stuff.

Madden's part in the intro is the fucking best

He had a week to prepare for this opening segment. Did he just forget that he had to be on tv that day?

[bapo!]

I think it's fair to say that there was a lot less of people trying to put things in historical perspective in real time during games back then. Even with that, I'm not sure the '85 Bears defense would have felt quite as historic then as it does now. At that time, most great teams were known for their defense--the Steel Curtain, Doomsday, Purple People Eaters, etc. I guess SF was in the process of changing things by 1985 but there wouldn't have been anything remarkable about the best team having the best defense then.

Yeah, that's fair. I'm watching this from today's perspective, so not only do I know what that team accomplished, but I'm also used to being sold a bill of goods every time I watch a game. Everything is the biggest or the best or the most something or other. 'Is Joe Flacco the greatest quarterback ever? Or is he merely the best quarterback playing today?' Etc.

"Bill Walton and the Celtics against Patrick Ewing and the Knicks"???

I think he says 'Larry Bird and Bill Walton against Patrick Ewing and the Knicks.' (That promo aired a couple of times, so maybe it was read differently the second time?) That turned into a pivotal game for the Celtics. They blew a 25-point lead and lost, then won 17 of their next 18.

[Rex]

no Alcoa Fantastic Finishes? What a waste of three hours.

[bapo!]

no Alcoa Fantastic Finishes? What a waste of three hours.

Ha. I was waiting for that, too. Sadly, this is the best substitute I could find. (A site called Adland has a few of them, but I don't feel like figuring what which scripts I need to allow so that they play in Firefox.)

[Johnnie]

Oh god, here come's Johnny to post 29 "Fuck you Haterz!" memes in righteous indignation...

Bapo! starts up an impressive thread chock full of everything, and the first post is to highlight and embiggen a few words to whine about and troll me with? But yet I'm the asshole.

[The Sybian]

I can't wait to watch some this. This is probably the first or second year of Jets football I truly understood what was going on. So many good memories of Fall and Winter Sundays. Playing football all morning into the early afternoon, then going in to watch the NFL the rest of the day. They a few years later, it was topped of with NFL Primetime and the Dream Season. I would love to go back for one day. Every year when it turns to fall, the feel in the air reminds me of playing football in my neighborhood.

I looked up Dream Season, as I remembered having the computer game they used to simulate the matchups. Couldn't remember the name, but it was NFL Challenge by XOR Software. You chose plays from an extensive playbook, and watched Xs and Os play out the results. The games took hours if you could make it that long.

[Steve of phpBB]

Madden and Summerall didn't seem to grasp the significance of this Bears defense. This was Week 15, so it should have been obvious by then how great they were, right? I can only recall Buddy Ryan being casually mentioned three times.

I think it's fair to say that there was a lot less of people trying to put things in historical perspective in real time during games back then. Even with that, I'm not sure the '85 Bears defense would have felt quite as historic then as it does now. At that time, most great teams were known for their defense--the Steel Curtain, Doomsday, Purple People Eaters, etc. I guess SF was in the process of changing things by 1985 but there wouldn't have been anything remarkable about the best team having the best defense then.

This is great. I don't remember that particular game, but I'm sure I watched it. My only other option on a mid-December Saturday in 1985 would have been studying for finals.

That team, especially that defense, felt pretty historic at the time. Even though we had all been trained to expect disappointment, we all knew those guys were doing something special.

[Giff]

Oh god, here come's Johnny to post 29 "Fuck you Haterz!" memes in righteous indignation...

Bapo! starts up an impressive thread chock full of everything, and the first post is to highlight and embiggen a few words to whine about and troll me with? But yet I'm the asshole.

That seems to be a pretty accurate synopsis.

[MaxWebster]

bapo! sums up perfectly what has most turned me off of sports as i get older.


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MaxWebster

... but I'm also used to being sold a bill of goods every time I watch a game. Everything is the biggest or the best or the most something or other...